Monday, January 05, 2009

THE GOOD, THE BAD, THE UGLY 2008- 2009 PART TWO

Note....It would be helpful if Part 1
were read as a context.



For years I struggled with who I, the person Paul Burleson, really am. This is terribly important because we tend to act on the basis of who we believe we are. If a person believes they are a victim, they act like one. If a person believes were abandoned because they were given up for adoption, they act it out in behavior that reveals rejection. Most of what they do will reek of being rejected. If one believes they are superior, they will evidence it. Pharisaic behavior results from this belief. [I'm reminded of what I once heard Peter Lord say, "You believe what you do..everything else is religious talk."]

In the early years of my own identity struggle I settled in on what I'd received/perceived about myself from my environment and family of origin relationships. Not too good. The reasons have been stated in earlier posts and will remain there for now.

I believed then that I was a person who couldn't. Couldn't what? Couldn't whatever. Couldn't anything. At least couldn't and it be right enough or good enough for others to value me personally which no one did by my observation of those original relationships. [All of us want to be valued personally by the way. It's one of the God-given desires created in us. As the Psalmist said.."Lord remember NOT the sins of my youth, but remember ME."]

Do you know how one acts when they believe they're valueless as a person and can't do anything right? They, generally, become super aggressive [Bullies or a false show of being in control.] OR super passive. [People who live between the wallpaper and the wall.] Either crushes. The first crushes others. The second crushes the wallflower. But both will destroy. Mine was the first part b.

Then I became a christian as a young teenager. Now everything is wonderful. Right? Wrong. Oh, it is true that eternity was settled and what a great thing it is to know you're a forgiven person. But for years I found myself struggling with those same feelings and beliefs about myself. I still felt/believed I couldn't. Couldn't what? As I said..couldn't anything. So the pretense of and need to be in control continued unabated and people, as usual, paid the price for my actions.

Oh I'd try to do my best. Sometimes I did extrememly well and sometimes I stunk the place up with failure. My value as a real person had it's highs and lows as you can see and my demands on others continued their crushing effects. [If you think it foolish to even be concerned about this you have much to learn about real life AND yourself in my opinion.]

But finally the Truth intervened, in the hands of the Holy Spirit, and I began to understand who I am in Christ in reality. It was no longer an objective truth about me as stated in black print on white paper. It was emotional, intellectual and spiritual reality as declared in the Scriptures. I found I really am, as is true of every believer, a loved, forgiven, accepted, valued, and empowered by His strength for any purposed task commanded to me...person. Free at last. Free at last. Thank God, I'm free at last. [With due respects to Martin Luther King Jr.] I know who I REALLY am according to HIM.

But I'll be if I didn't find myself sometimes struggling [failures] in some of the ways [how I acted as a person] that had haunted me all along. They continued to feel familiar and comfortable and easy in spite of my knowing I am a new person in Christ. [I now call this the 'flesh' as scripture does.] I didn't want to fail in those old areas of course. [Needing to be in control and crushing others by being so.] A longing for change was fervently there. But failure in my familiar areas came periodically anyway. Oh maybe not as often. But the depth of shame was even worse. Failure was an ever present companion. Not a pleasant thing at all.

That's when I began to understand something new and freeing for me. I was responsible for my personal choices good OR bad...and... I was not a victim. You could say, as I read one man say, the statutes of limitations had run out on my childhood traumas. It was about time. Generally I'd blamed everything and everyone under the sun for the wrong in me. It was being a 'Burleson.' It was being the first born son. It was being an ACA. An adult child of an alcoholic. I was a blame giver not a blame taker you see.
But that new understanding of responsibility brought about a whole new battlefield of it's own and no matter how much I might try to deny it, I was/am still a person that is somewhat GOOD, BAD, AND UGLY and I was/am now responsible for it all. That's freeing you might ask. How?

That will be the subject of the next part of this "happy New year " post for 2009. Til then..happy new year again.


Paul B.

Wednesday, December 31, 2008

THE GOOD, THE BAD, THE UGLY 2008-2009 PART ONE

I'm sure most of you have seen or heard of the Clint Eastwood movie by the above title. I'm sure you also know that 2008 is coming to an end and 2009 is upon us. Finally, I'm sure most of you haven't a clue as to why I put the two together in this post. I'll try to answer that in the following several parts to this post celebrating the new year.

For many, the end of 2008 will bring a reflection upon the "what was" of that year and some of the "what was" wasn't too good. For many others, the coming of 2009 will bring a resolution of the "what will be" for the new year and many will have a sense of frustration because of the promises past that never came to pass and the "what will be" wound up being the old "what was."

I'm convinced that BOTH reflecting on the old and resolutions for the new CAN be dangerous to our emotional and spiritual health if we're not careful.

I have also personally found that when both are looked at honestly [the past year and the prospective year] we will find a little of the good, the bad, and the ugly mentioned in the title of Eastwood's movie and without that genuine honesty there will be no possibility of a "happy New Year." [Or a living with the old one in peace for that matter.]

I'm aware that only one out of the ten readers of this post may understand or need what I will ultimately say here, [that may be overly optimistic about total readership :)] but it is for that one I will write.

The next segment will come in a couple of days. Then the next.....until I've said it all. I tried to put it in one post and quickly realized I would lose everyone including me in the length of it. So in parts it will come. But it will come.

Next Part 11. Until then.....

Happy New Year

Paul B.

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

A POEM FOR THE SEASON

Mary's friend and highschool classmate and my good friend T. D. Webb has written an exceptional poem that was posted on another blog. I've chosen to post it here. Read it and you will understand why. As I said Tommy, exceptional. Way to go.



IT'S CHRISTMAS TIME


It’s Christmas time in this mired land,
Bone chilling cold the season,
The Son of God became a man
Beyond all human reason.

It’s in the record of His Book,
In pages old and worn,
Announcing news for those who look,
A baby Savior born.

How could you, Lord, demean Yourself,
To this rebellious earth,
Put judgement power upon the shelf,
In ignominious birth.

Yet, You saved us lovingly
Beyond the scope of time,
With grace incomprehensive be
To a merely mortal mind.

From eternal to eternity,
You planned this to instill,
From predetermined destiny,
Accomplished perfect will.

Reacting, man predictably,
Received the news eschewed,
No faith, but doubt indubitably,
In crazed thoughts misconstrued.

So to this day the minds of men,
Are lead in grand deception,
Allowing many to descend
To utter desolation.

But for the remnant God did choose,
To save from dread despair,
He from the start deemed not to lose
Them to the Prince of Air.

It’s Christmas time in this mired land,
He came to save His own,
Great Sacrifice, He lives to stand,
Our sin He did atone.

In His Grace and Peace.

T.D. Webb

Friday, December 19, 2008

CIVIL DISOBEDIENCE THAT IS REALLY CIVIL

I've recently read that there is a protest being orchestrated against Rick Warren, Pastor of Saddleback Church in California who has been invited to pray the benediction at the inauguration of President-elect Obama. The protest strategy is that the participants are to "boo" from the beginning of Pastor Rick's prayer to the end. Have you ever wanted to protest something that way? I have. Maybe even long and meaningless prayers. Just kidding.

I've often wondered if during the sixties and seventies, which are often referred to as the decades of protest, I was not too blase' with regards to the gender and racial inequalities that were so prevelant in America along with some other issues worth protesting. I'm not speaking of using the pulpit in dealing with social issues, but as a citizen I have some personal responsibility in such matters. I know there is a fine line to be walked in being a preacher of the gospel and becoming nothing more than a social voice in the pulpit rather than the gospel voice announcing the need for a new birth, the One who provides that birth and the coming of a new Kingdom. I NEVER want to loose that voice in order to correct ANY social wrong.

That said, some wrongs are worth protesting. Without a doubt it requires courage to stand for the truth of the gospel and share it as christians. It requires that same kind of courage as a citizen to affirm standards that exist that are worth preserving as a society and to propose and defend any laws that make possible the order and justice and freedom of all our citizens. It could even take the form of "civil disobedience," I think with an emphasis on civil.

The protest decades that I mentioned earlier sometimes took an angry and even illegal tone to them. [Much as the booing protest which, it seems to me, is more out of anger than anything else.] It was an illegal and deadly protest that the man associated with President-Elect Barack Obama was involved in that created a pause inside me during the campaign me as to the qualifications of our new President to-be. But I digress.

However, to throw out protest altogether because some do it with anger or illegally would do great damage to our nation in my judgment. There does exist a form of protest worthy of praise; and it is that protest to which I'm drawing attention. To protest civilly against whatever would bring about the destruction of the moral order and the social order is an act of courage and piety I believe. That sort of protest against the enemies of order and justice and freedom will be heard far better than will violence or anger in the name of protest.

Those who see our protest when it's that kind may not agree with what we say but will more likely give our issue position a hearing. So I'm going to share some remarks I read concerning rightful protest in this age of ours when often it seems as if the bottom has dropped out of what we hold dear. The following is adapted from a source I found that was delivered long ago [30 years] but still meaningful to me.

CIVIL PROTEST THAT IS MORE LIKELY TO BE HEARD.

"If we protest, it ought to be a protest arising out of love, and not out of hatred;

that protest ought to be an affirmation that the fear of God is the beginning of wisdom.

That protest ought to be an affirmation of the dignity of man, not an appeal to primitive impulse.

That protest ought to be an affirmation of the ties of family and community, not an enthusiasm for centralized power or for the overthrow of private and public affections.

That protest ought to be an affirmation of the goodness of God's creation, not a denunciation of the life-impulse.

That protest ought to be temperate and patient, not an inciting to violence.

That protest ought to be undertaken in humility, not in the self-righteousness of the Pharisee.

That protest ought to reunite the generations and the classes, rather than becoming a declaration of war with sword in hand.

That protest ought to ask for the recognition of moral authority, and not for the casting of every person upon his private petty resources of intellect and appetite.

And that protest ought to be promulgated in the name of the permanent things, rather than being a shriek amidst the winds of doctrine.

Protest which ignores these aims and limits is no better than the howl of the fanatic. That howl echoes through the world today; it has been raised recently upon some campuses, in crazy protest against the President's visit to a German graveyard, in frantic demand that South Africa be reduced to the happy condition of Uganda or Chad. Before the stony idols of Unreason and Devastation, the modern mob bows down. Unreason often seems fashionably clever, and Devastation has its charms for the bored and the hopeless. But it requires courage to speak up for the truth with character in this time of troubles which is our age."

My final words of this post ...

I believe there is wisdom in these words for christians also who disagree and debate one another theologically. Or those who protest the actions of leaders or governing bodies in a denomination. This is one of the reasons I have supported and admired the actions of Wade Burleson the past three years. NOT because he is my son. But because he is a civil protestor as a christian in Southern Baptist life. May his tribe increase.

Paul B.

Civility isn't weakness..Anger isn't strength.

Friday, December 12, 2008

MERRY CHRISTMAS

I thought I would write a Christmas greeting and some thoughts for the season. Then I read what my friend, Rick Anthony, pastor of Grace Fellowship Church in Norman Oklahoma had written to his fellowship and decided it needed to be heard by anyone passing by my blog. Great thoughts Rick...thanks.


OUTSIDE THE BOX

After the most recent election I made the personal commitment to pray for our new president. I committed to pray for this man even if I find myself in disagreement with his decisions or direction. I also have committed to pray for those who serve as leaders with him. This has really created an interesting challenge as he has begun announcing his choices for his cabinet. There are some chosen by him that I didn’t expect and some that I feel are wrong for the job. There are some that I think are perfectly suited while others have been chosen who were not even in my top twenty-five. Basically, I am finding that it is somewhat tougher to pray for something or someone when it not my choice or the decision that I would make. It is tough to maintain my prayer support when I am having to pray outside of my box, my box that defines how I have decided this should happen.

The people in Isaiah’s day had this same problem thinking outside of the box. Read Isaiah 9:6-7. Who is the ultimate person this passage is talking about?

It is ultimately speaking of Christ and it clearly explains that He will be coming as a child, yet when that happened almost no one expected that the Savior was a little baby. The result of this inability to think outside the box resulted in most of the people missing the opportunity to sit at the feet of Christ.

What areas of life do you miss out on due to the fact that you have allowed yourself to be boxed in?

Pastor Rick Anthony


From the Burlesons to all of you....
Merry Christmas--2008


Paul B.

Tuesday, December 09, 2008

TOO GOOD TO PASS UP SHOWING


Monday, November 17, 2008

MY TAKE ON AMERICA AND HER PRESIDENT-ELECT

I have read much of late about how America needs to repent over the abortions that are taking place and the movement toward legitimizing homosexuality and if she doesn't God will judge her and may be doing that now through the economic and political difficulties presently being faced by all Americans. But if America were to repent of doing those kinds of things she would be blessed because God blesses a nation that is righteous.

I certainly respect all believers and others who have a passion for protecting the unborn. I abhor abortion as do many of you I'm confident. I reject homosexuality as a legitimate action as I do adultery and fornication. I also abhor racial and gender hatred that is often seen in America. I also believe certain other things are true were one to think biblical.

One....No nation will be blessed because of righteous acts or judged for unrighteous acts in the present day since all acts outside of Christ are as filthy rags.... [Unrighteous]...and... judgment on that unrighteousness has been taken by Him on the Cross. THAT IS OUR MESSAGE. Blessings flow from having a relationship with the One who did that Cross work on our behalf. For God to bless a nation BECAUSE of righteous deeds would violate what He says about the need of the work of the Cross.

There are natural consequences of good actions for any nation [or bad actions] but that is reaping what is sown. That is the normal process of natural/common law which, partially at least, reflects the nature of God. There is also a common grace He has for the unrighteous. But to define any good deeds as RIGHTEOUS, as I said, and to think of God blessing BECAUSE of performing those deeds is beyond the scripture.

Two....If that Cross event and what was accomplished there is rejected then there has been appointed a day in eternity for judgment and the One has been announced who will do the work of judging all men in that day as He alone can know their heart. [Acts 17:31] So our message is that judgment has ALREADY come [the Cross] and will come in eternity if that Cross message is rejected.

America, Russia, Korea, China, [any nation] will not find favor with God by actions good or bad. It is the gospel message alone that announces from where His Grace and Mercy flow and a revival in the hearts of God's people to share that message is needed, and is, in my opinion, the only TRUE hope of any person on this earth today.

Three....Because I am an American citizen AND I am a believer in that message referenced above, I will work to get civil laws passed that would reflect the sacredness of life and protect the innocent which is what God has established governments to do. [1 Peter 2:12-14] I will work to make as law the natural order of things that make for life as God created it to be in areas like family life, among other areas, for the general well being of the citizens of our nation. Such laws would make for a safe, [punishment of evildoers and protection of the innocent] sane, and free society politically. It would be for the good of the people and the best possible life in a lost and unregenerate world from my perspective. Those are my political goals as a citizen and a believer.

I will also pray for our leaders whomever they might be and I join you, I'm sure, in longing for their hearts to be opened to the Christ of the gospel who WOULD enable a sacredness of life to reign in their minds and hearts as they govern. I know I will also work for the election of those TO govern who share the values by which I live.

Four.... But I will NOT allow my message to become less than the gospel no matter the importance of the wrongs that need to be righted done by nations and their rulers. I will work as a citizen, who is a christian, for fair and just laws with the purpose of making our nation a safe and just place, as I said, for every person, race, gender, and the unborn and elderly. But I will not lose my focus on the fact that our only real hope is in God's ability to change hearts through His Son.

Finally.. This is a difficult balance for me to achieve and a narrow line for me to walk but walk it I must. There is only one holy nation today and only one blessed people today and that is the holy blessed body of believers worldwide [The Church/Body/Bride] many of whom find themselves in difficult national circumstances that demand heartfelt action as a citizen, if there is the freedom to do so. But that action MUST be done without losing the message of hope for all people including leaders. My message must NEVER become an American righteousness instead of Kingdom righteousness. Nor should christians in other nations have a nationalistic message either. What a mess we would create.

May God grant revival to His people, salvation to the lost, and courage to those of us who know Him, that we may love the lost and work against their actions when necessary politically yet all the while presenting them with the Grace of the Cross that has captured us and set us free to love them as we would never be able to do otherwise.

I WILL pray for the President-Elect and I will continue to pray for all elected leaders as well. I will then work, as a citizen, to replace those, by vote, that I believe would not advance what I hold to as the best way of natural life for all American people, even the unborn. But I will not close the door on bringing to them the message that is THEIR only hope by demonstrating a spirit of hatred BECAUSE of their sinful [By my standards as a christian] actions and beliefs. As I said...this is difficult to walk... but our Lord did. He did it in a culture that reflected ALL the biases, hatred, violence, and general disregard for life one can ever imagine. He led the way in personally reflecting the sacredness and value of people regardless of national origin, gender or race, all without losing His focus on the message. Are His servants called on for anything less?



Paul Burleson